So....what's the plan???

So what's the plan??? To be perfectly honest I'm not quite sure. When I quit drinking almost 19 years ago I quit cold turkey, I went through detox. You can't quit eating. But you can detox. My physician and dietician have set down the guideline of 45 carbs per meal. Unlike the girl that lost 100 lbs in the article I posted on FB, I'm not going to fast or juice, for a diabetic that just is not healthy. I want to lose weight and eat healthy, but I also don't want to shock my body systems. I want to lose the weight realistically without any trendy new age diet. I don't want to eat that way for the rest of my life. Portion control and carb control is key. So is getting the right amount of vegetables, proteins and fruits into my food plan as well. Right now I weigh 201 lbs. Yes, I said it out loud. It's just like the first time I went to an AA meeting and said, 'Hi, I'm Kimberly and I'm an alcoholic'. Admitting I had a problem was the first step. Asking for help and taking action on it are the two hardest steps. In boot camp I was told never to show weakness. Today I feel like I'm running about all exposed and vulnerable. What got this started was a grocery store trip tonight with the hubby. I had been craving orange juice all day, and carbs... he just turned to me and said 'I'm worried, you're wanting all the wrong things'. He's never told me I cannot have anything, he's expressed 'concern'. Something inside me snapped and I realized I was exhibiting all of the characteristic alcoholic behaviors but with food. So for my last 'meal' I chose a small serving bottle of 'Simply Orange' orange juice and a small bag of jalepeno chips. 

What are my weaknesses? Sweets of any kind, pizza, and soda. Today I have been soda free. I have been caffeine free since my heart problems started up a few years back, but not soda free. Sodas REALLY do make you want to eat more, and eat more carbs. I thought the doctors were just pulling my leg, it's true. So friends, I'll stick to my sugar free low carb brownies and angel food cake and whole wheat crust pizza. If you start parading your See's candy, deep dish pizza, and Philly Cheesesteaks in front of my face we're gonna have words. Just sayin'.  Well that's all for tonight. I've cleaned out the fridge and have been figuring out tomorrow's dinner plans. Thursday is Band and Choir at church and David and I have been in the habit of getting something 'quick', and 'quick' hasn't been as healthy as it should be. 

Exercise. I have a bike, and I have two feet, and I have a gym membership I haven't used in three years which I still pay for. After fighting a lymphatic infection (the better end of September), Pneumonia twice over the course of three months (October through December) and a nasty cold I am finally on the mend.... and feel like I can exercise without killing myself. I am OUT of SHAPE and it is embarrassing as Hell.  My plan is to start back to the gym by Friday and slowly ease myself in. I don't want to turn myself into a jelly pretzel my first day, get discouraged and fall off the exercise wagon. MODERATION is key. 

For those of you who don't know me, I've shared a pretty raw picture of myself. Take away what you want, leave the rest. It is what it is. For those of you who know me, I love ya, and I am so glad you are in my life. 

'With God, all things are possible'.... and I can't remember the Bible verse that comes from. Oye...